CBSSports.com reported the Pacers made a movie about free agent Lance Stephenson's time in Indiana and said it must be the most exciting film ever made about life in that state.
Did they miss Breaking Away and Hoosiers?

Rick Blaine is neutral on France vs Germany, but there are some parts of Rio he doesn't advise invading.

Lot of respect for Algeria's performance against Germany.
All that with no orange slices at halftime.

Soccer conundrum: I hate penalty kicks/I hope this goes to penalty kicks - it's so exciting.

The Bettman booing at the NHL Draft in Philly was incredible.
I haven't heard a note sustained that long since I saw a World Cup goal scored on Univision.

Luis Suarez banned from ALL soccer activities for four months.
Oh my, can you imagine how rusty his flopping will be when he comes back?

Hulk, Neymar, Cesar...is this a soccer team or the next Marvel Studios movie?

Carmelo Anthony says he wants to play with Kobe Bryant and LeBron James.
Wow - he's going to love the 2016 Rio Olympics.

Jason Kidd's request to be NBA commissioner has been denied.

Netherlands-Mexico kickoff should have been at 4:20.

Not impressed by Brazil's road record in this World Cup.

You've heard of NFL and NBA players "eating their way out of the league".
Uruguay did the same at the World Cup.

Reports say there are a massive amount of Colombia fans in LA.
Is that code for "cocaine users"?

Every Knicks story feels like it was produced by The Onion.

Knicks free agent Carmelo Anthony is expected to make an announcement the 2nd week of July on which team he is going to ruin next.

The Wells Fargo Center crowd has been nominated for a special Grammy award for its booing of Gary Bettman.

A teenage boy broke into Cristiano Ronaldo's hotel room.
Apparently, there's a ring of hair gel thieves working the World Cup.
Take some L'Oréal Homme back to the favelas.

Online bookmaker 888poker terminated its sponsorship with Luis Suarez after he was banned for biting.
666poker gave him a raise.

Have you ever seen a crazier collection of goofy hairstyles than the World Cup?
Who cuts these guys' hair - Edward Scissorhands of God?

The NBA Draft was held in Brooklyn.
Unfortunately, the local hipsters there only watch the MLS draft.

President Obama announced his schedule of violating restaurant sneeze guards may be affected by World Cup games.

A green laser was shone into the eyes of Russia's goalkeeper during their match against Algeria.
That happened to me at a ZZ Top concert once.

No World Cup Friday as all the FIFA officials are huge NHL Draft junkies.

Emotional moment as Cameroon's players said goodbye to the families that billeted them during the World Cup.

The Knicks are so bad they started their rebuild by trading for guys in their mid-thirties.

Phil Jackson and Derek Fisher are looking to improve on the Bermuda Triangle offense in New York.

England, Spain and Italy all failing to advance to the World Cup's round of 16.
This is kind of like having a NBA playoffs without the Knicks, Lakers and Celtics.

LeBron James informed the Miami Heat he will become a free agent on July 1.
Further details will be revealed on an upcoming TV special, "The Revision".

FIFA launched an investigation into the Luis Suarez biting incident.
They are calling in the best English orthodontists.

Experts say anyone encountering the rogue coyote in Vancouver's Stanley Park should throw their arms up and yell "Go away, coyote!".
Aka the Mike D'Antoni defense.

Stoppage time, or as Luis Suarez likes to call it, "dessert".

Uruguay and Italy: was that a soccer match or a zombie attack?

Too bad Brazil and Portugal didn't play each other.
More frosting than a box of Pop-Tarts.

Mexican fans continue to shout homophobic slurs at the World Cup.
They accused Croatian players of drinking watermelon margaritas.

Uruguay versus Italy Tuesday.
Expect more diving than the crew in The Abyss.

The average price of a World Cup hotel room in Brazil is $461.
It's soccer; shouldn't people be staying in flophouses?

Carmelo Anthony reportedly wrote the New York Knicks a letter saying he was filing for free agency.
Does anyone believe this?
At best, it was a text with more Us, 4s and 2s than a Prince song.

Cristiano Ronaldo is so metrosexual he makes Wham! look like Duck Dynasty.

Ronaldo's beautiful tying cross gave the witch doctor profession another credibility hit.

The US-Portugal game was so hot and humid they took a water break in the first half.
Where's Scott Thornton when you need him?

U.S. women's soccer goalie Hope Solo was arrested for domestic assault.
Prosecutors are pushing for one month frozen in carbonite.

Who will emerge from the Group of Bad Breath?

As the draft nears, NHL execs are working longer hours than Hope Solo's PVR.

A Toronto ad agency moved their office into a bar for the entire World Cup month.
Absolut great idea.

ESPN and the LPGA finally found a way to get Woody Allen to watch the US Women's Open.

Spain is set to meet England in a special faded empires consolation match.
Loser rows the other one home on an old slave galley.

Highly-rated Kansas big man Joel Embiid is set to have surgery on his right foot just ahead of the NBA Draft.
He shouldn't have told anyone.
They could announce his pick, have four guys carry him onstage on one of those World Cup magic stretchers.
He leaps up, "I'm healed!"

The Brewers traded starting pitcher Brad Mills to the A's for a dollar.
The Blue Jays offer of Canadian Tire money was rejected.

At least 3 of the World Cup stadia won't have enough usage demand to be financially viable after the tournament.
Their only hope to break even is if U2 announces a 5-year Brazilian tour.

Japan vs Greece: two countries forever divided by how they like to prepare squid.

FIFA's concussion protocol: players have to go to a dark room showing video highlights of Wayne Rooney World Cup goals.

The USPTO also revoked the trademark on Cavaliers, saying Cleveland's use of the name was offensive to fun-loving swashbucklers.
They didn't even want to hear about Lake Erie pirates.

The Redskins lost their trademarks, and the nickname has already been appropriated by the contingent of English soccer fans in Brazil.

People have asked how some of these teams even made it to the World Cup.
When they went to FIFA meetings, they remembered to take their Visa card.

The 85 fans caught after they stormed into the Maracana have been kicked out of Brazil almost as fast as Spain.

No longer kings, Spain can return to vacuuming the turf at SkyDome.

According to Seat Geek, the average price paid for a ticket to a group stage game in Sao Paulo is $1,268.
In Cuiaba = $198.
Lesson: mamas let your soccer fan babies grow up to be cowboys.

Read somewhere that if O.J.'s slow-speed white Bronco chase had continued for the last 20 years at the same pace, it would have travelled 7 million miles.
I wonder how many more people would have died?

The Golden Boot: top goal scorer at the World Cup or Donald Sterling's divorce?

The Royals are now just a half-game behind the Tigers in the AL Central.
I don't think that's one of the criteria for a Bill James' "Great Season".

These World Cup matchups have no boundaries: Nigeria is e-mailing Iran special discount offers on yellowcake.

Nice to see the Spurs strike a blow for the common multi-millionaire.

Does Argentina get credited for two World Cup wins after beating Bosnia and Herzegovina?

How about that finals MVP? The Hawaiian island of Kawhi has never been prouder.

U.S. Vice President Joe Biden is attending the World Cup Monday to see if there is any corruption money left over.

Reports say free agent-to-be Carmelo Anthony is leaning towards the Rockets or the Bulls.
Haven't Houston and Chicago fans suffered enough?

Elephant poachers 2 Whale hunters 1

Colombia's president won his coke-ouzo bet with Greece.

The Netherlands beat Spain 5-1 in that country's worst defeat since the Spanish Armada.

The LAPD warned fans without tickets to stay away from Staples.
First the competition from online retailers, now this.

What kind of dirt will Sterling's investigators dig up on the NBA?
Even money they discover Adam Silver arrived on Earth by UFO.

Fitting that the Stanley Cup Final is ended by a man in a goalie mask on Friday The 13th.

Who will be reported to score more goals in World Cup play: Vladimir Putin or Kim Jong-un?

Donald Sterling said the Redskins should change their name.

Donald Sterling has hired 4 private investigators to dig up dirt on the NBA and its owners.
I'm guessing none of them are Shaft.

Fans of Jennifer Lopez and Pitbull complained about sound quality at the opening ceremony.
Sorry, Pitbull fans, not every show can be at Carnegie Hall.

Norway's curlers were rooting for Croatia.

I think the Lady and the Tramp ate pasta off of Croatia's jerseys.

Brazil's soccer roster: fewer last names than a swingers party.

Metta World Peace will be an assistant coach for a girls high school basketball team starting this fall.
Wait until he sees how high school girls interact with each other.
It makes The Malice At The Palace look like a weekend Buddhist retreat.

They released a dove before the start of the opening World Cup match between Brazil and Croatia.
It was caught and BBQ'd within an hour.

The post-Game 3 Miami Heat press conference had all the warmth of an Ingmar Bergman film.

Ronaldo looking good for Portugal.
Back to Hogwarts for that Ghanaian witch doctor.

New Knicks coach Derek Fisher says he wants guys to fear stepping on the court when they come in to Madison Square Garden.
How are they going to do that: give front row seats to paternity lawyers?

The Rangers Mats Zuccarello said his favorite player growing up was Patrick Kane.
He's 26 and Kane is 25.
My favourite player growing up is Connor McDavid.

Jennifer Lopez has pulled out of performing the official song to open the World Cup.
Officials are scrambling to see if they can fly in the '85 Chicago Bears to replace her with the "World Cup Shuffle".

With Magic Mountain closing Colossus by the end of the summer, the Detroit Tigers bullpen will be the biggest roller coaster in America.

France beat Jamaica 8-0 Sunday in their last tuneup match before the World Cup.
After the game, the Kingston Athletic Department announced they would go back to focus on bobsledding.

The San Diego Padres have told Johnny Manziel to start acting like a utility infielder.

The Richard Sherman cover for EA Sports Madden 15 is almost identical to the cover for Rob Zombie's upcoming Haitian Zombie Attack game.

Martin Brodeur wants to play one more season.
To avoid culture shock leaving New Jersey, I suggest Metallurg Magnitogorsk.

If Sarah Jessica Parker gets Sex And The City 3 made, does that count as a Triple Crown?

For the two days between Games 1 and 2 of the NBA Finals, the AT&T Center will be used for a Bikram Yoga festival.

The NFL may be heading to a four-day draft, and is considering New York, LA and Chicago as possible 2015 host cities.
Can a NFL Draft host city lottery show be far behind?
And how will they decide who hosts that?

Subway and commuter train operators in Sao Paolo, Brazil went on strike Thursday.
Are you paying attention, Segway? This is your big chance.

When is the Ghanaian witch doctor who cast a spell on Cristiano Ronaldo going to lift his curse on the Brazilian construction industry?

A Ghanaian witch doctor claims he cast a spell on Portugal's Cristiano Ronaldo that will keep him out of the World Cup.
Landon Donovan is sending the witch doctor a photo of Jurgen Klinsmann.

Prince attended a Rafael Nadal match at the French Open.
Usually, Andy Murray is the one with royals at his matches.

A lot of publicity for Skidmore College in upstate New York teaching a credit course on Miley Cyrus.
That's nothing - there are already SEC athletes majoring in Nascar and Duck Dynasty.

Donald Sterling went to a black mass in south LA.
My first thought was: is that the best way for the most hated man in America to rehab his image, dabbling in Satanism and witchcraft?

Dan Marino withdrew his concussion lawsuit against the NFL.
Experts say it would be too difficult to tell the difference between brain damage and Marino's mind before he entered the league.

Johnny Manziel had a rough day one of OTAs, making late reads and throwing picks.
Well, they did tell him to start acting like a backup QB...

Great story on Juwaan Espinal, who suffers from cerebral palsy, getting asked to his high school prom by his dream date with the help of Robert Griffin III.
We're making progress since the early 2000s, when Green Bay Packers would ask girls to the prom in hot tubs.

They just updated Donald Sterling's condition to "mentally decapitated".

Controversial trade of 5 Gitmo Taliban detainees for one American POW.
And two months before the July 31st trade deadline.

In light of new corruption claims over Qatar's 2022 World Cup bid, a FIFA VP said he'd support a new round of bribed voting.

Logo designs came out for a possible future Seattle NHL franchise named the Sea Lions.
If you're Seattle playing in the Pacific division, do you really want your team nickname to be prey for orcas and sharks?