The Saskatchewan Roughriders lost the CFL's Grey Cup championship game on a too many men on the field flag, and with it, hundreds of dollars in endorsement deals.

Grey Cup final score (28-27) actually resembles normal football game.

The height of irony? At last, Tim Tebow will work on Sundays.

Tiger Woods hit a tree and a fire hydrant?
His driving sounds like my golf game.

An ancient weapon was found at the building site of a new Windsor, Ontario arena.
No, it wasn't a Chris Chelios stick.

Joe Mauer would have been unanimous for the AL MVP, except for Keizo Konishi of Japan's Kyodo News who voted for Miguel Cabrera.
Konishi also voted for Godzilla over Bernie Madoff for worst monster of the year.

LSU lost 25-23 at Ole Miss, exhibiting the worst clock management since Flavor Flav.

L.A. Clippers play-by-play announcer Ralph Lawler was suspended one game by Fox for remarks he made about Memphis center Hamed Haddadi.
Lawler has broadcast over 2,400 Clippers games.
Hasn't he suffered enough?

Prime Minister Stephen Harper visited the Golden Temple, one of India's holiest sites.
Indian President Pratibha Patil plans to make a similar gesture on his return visit to Canada, when he'll visit the Hockey Hall of Fame.

In World Cup qualifying, France's Thierry Henry had the most controversial use of hands since Bud Adams.

Wyoming beat Peru State 120-73 in college basketball.
Was that in Laramie or Lima?

Tennessee Titans owner Bud Adams was fined $250,000 for giving Buffalo fans the finger.
It's the first time anyone associated with the 2009 Titans has raised a single digit in the air.

The Pontiac Silverdome sold to a Canadian real estate company for $583,000.
Why so cheap? They have to take the Detroit Lions back as a tenant.

Michelle Wie won her first LPGA Tour tournament.
To put it in perspective, this is like the Segway finally beating a shopping cart in a race.

The Calgary Stampeders Teyo Johnson was stabbed at a KISS concert.
It was believed to be during the song "I Was Made For Loving You", and self-inflicted.

Chad Ochocinco was fined $20,000 for flashing an official a dollar bill during a video review.
This was the worst financial return on the humorous dollar for a video since The Love Guru.

Three freshmen Tennessee Volunteers football players were arrested for armed robbery.
None of them redshirted this season, but they may soon be moving on to their second set of orange shirts.

Eight members of the Hamilton Tiger-Cats have been fined for jumping in a boat near the end zone after scoring a TD against Winnipeg.
When Chad Ochocinco hears about this, his head is going to explode.

World Series MVP Hideki Matsui became a free agent Monday.
Expect a lot of frantic negotiations between Yankees brass and Tri-State Region porn dealers.

The list of MLB free agents looks like the roster of The Bad News Bears without the charm.
It's as if all the most overpaid, overrated, aging players all became eligible at once.
Good luck to any GM searching for Easter eggs in that minefield.

Former MLB-er Victor Zambrano's mother was kidnapped in Venezuela.
The criminals' demands: Magglio Ordonez's aunt and two 2nd cousins to be named later.

Toronto was awarded the 2015 Pan-Am Games over Lima, Peru and Bogota, Columbia.
Sweet revenge after finishing third behind Lima and Bogota to host the 2014 Cocaine Games.

The Knicks and Nets have started the NBA season a combined 1-13.
Prepare a parade down the "Canyon of Zeroes".

Is Sammy Sosa trying to get cast as The Joker in the next Batman movie?

The Yankees organization celebrated their World Series victory by reportedly ordering 200 bottles of champagne in a New York City restaurant.
The sommelier was summoned after Mark Teixeira repeatedly failed to open the bottles with a sword.

The movie The Men Who Stare At Goats opens this weekend.
Finally, a documentary on Bill Buckner and the 1986 World Series.

Adidas has discontinued its deal with Central Florida over Michael Jordan's freshman son Marcus's insistence to wear Nikes.
This is the biggest battle over shoes since The Wizard of Oz.

The Alberta government is investigating why the Calgary Flames received the H1N1 vaccination before at-risk members of the general public.
The mood is reversed in Ontario, where the public is urging authorities to give the Maple Leafs a needle.

L.A. Clippers owner and real estate mogul Donald Sterling is paying a multi-million dollar legal settlement after his company discriminated against renting apartments to Hispanics, blacks and families with children.
Clippers fans wish he would put as much effort into draft preparation as tenant screening.

Michigan is 5-4 and struggling.
Rich Rodriguez is having a longer transition period than Dr. Renee Richards.

Andre Agassi said he lost the 1990 French Open final because he was worried his wig would fall apart.
That's why Howard Cosell "never played the game".

The New York City Marathon famously passes through all 5 boroughs.
Like a tourist in the Big Apple, they both spend as little time as possible on Staten Island.