I like the San Francisco Giants versatility.
They can beat you with steroids; they can beat you with chardonnay.

Has Luis Suarez bitten anyone yet this season?
He's probably not playing Halloween weekend for religious reasons.

FIFA officials inspected the BC Place turf ahead of the 2015 Women's World Cup.
Probably hoping to find some lucky toonies or loonies hidden in the carpet.

Ex-Biogenesis chief Tony Bosch had his bail revoked after failing two drug tests.
He forgot Tony Montana's first rule of Drug Club: don't get high on your own supply.

USA Swimming suspended Michael Phelps six months after his latest DUI charge.
Phelps will be missing the 2015 world championships, indicated he needs to spend time outside of party environments, and hopes to see everyone in Rio.

There were so many Houston Texans fans in Cowboys Stadium Sunday, the Dallas sideline had trouble hearing Jerry Jones calling plays.

It's down to Almaty, Kazakhstan versus Beijing to host the 2022 Winter Olympics.
Kazakhstan is billing itself as "the world's largest landlocked country".
Who is chairing their bid committee, Sacha Baron Cohen?

A man running in an inflatable bubble was rescued off the coast of Florida.
I bet it was Will Muschamp.

The LA Kings will have their names engraved on the Stanley Cup by the Kardashians' nails.

No headset; just a jolly guy clapping on the sideline.
Michigan basically has a mascot as head coach.

Stephen Hawking says he can't wrap his head around the Detroit Tigers bullpen ERA.

The Oregon Ducks got a costly celebration penalty late in the Arizona game.
They were praying to Phil Knight.

2013 MLS champs Sporting Kansas City visited the White House this week.
They weren't invited; but like everyone else these days, they just went in anyway.

The Ottawa Senators just signed one of their ice girls to a 7-year contract.

The Washington Nationals hid Jayson Werth garden-gnomes all over the D.C. area, and whoever finds the 6 autographed ones wins tickets to game two of the NLDS.
Just what the White House security detail needs right now: a frenzied scavenger hunt.

The Oregon Ducks wore some pink Thursday night versus Arizona to raise awareness of garish, weekly uniform changes.

Matthew McConaughey met with the Texas Longhorns football team during practice.
The next day, half of them tested positive for traces of marijuana.
Call it the Ross Rebagliati Effect.

The chance that Brady Hoke is Michigan's coach next season is lower than Bluto Blutarsky's grade point average.

The NFL Draft is now set for April 30-May 2, but it's still unknown if Jameis Winston will free fall in a green room in Chicago or Los Angeles.

North Korea leader Kim Jong-un has been hospitalized with two broken ankles.
That's on Rodman's coaching!
Why did he have him guarding Chris Paul?