Malaysia lost to Pakistan in an Olympic field hockey qualifier, despite shaving their heads to ward off evil spirits.
That's not working for the Miami Heat, either.

Texas Christian University has joined the Big East conference.
It will be fascinating to see their parkour team adapt to the northeast's urban jungles after the southwest landscapes.

A report said the San Francisco Giants are interested in Derek Jeter.
Will he take his talents to North Beach?

Boise State coach Chris Petersen defended his kicker, Kyle Brotzman, after he missed two easy field goals at the end of BSU's loss to Nevada, saying: "That's one that 99 out of 100 times he's going to make."
Uh, I think he means 98 out of 100 times.

One difference between the Super Bowl and the Grey Cup: 1/4 of the NFL's teams don't play in the Super Bowl.

The NFL fined the Denver Broncos $100,000 for filming the San Francisco 49ers practice in London.
It is the worst return on money committed to tape in 2010 since Prince of Persia.

The Black Eyed Peas are playing at halftime of the Super Bowl.
Who are they opening for?

Tennessee Titans coach Jeff Fisher was unimpressed by Vince Young's apology via text message, saying the proper man thing to do was discuss it in a live chat room.

Derek Jeter's financial demands are like the inverse image of Dr. Evil's.

Ohio State president Gordon Gee says the Buckeyes refuse to meet Boise State or TCU in a spelling bee.

Britain announced its national terror threat will remain at a severe level during the 2012 London Olympics.
Authorities said there is no way they can train enough orthodontists before England takes the world stage.

The Cincinnati Bengals Terrell Owens and Chad Ochocinco are getting another reality series together.
This one's called The Biggest Losers.

Top USC freshman RB Dillon Baxter was declared ineligible after he got a ride to campus on a golf cart.
Probably a courtesy cart while his Corvette was in the shop.

The NHL may get the U.S. network deal its been coveting.
CBS is considering producing "Survivor: Jobing.com Arena".

The Miami Heat have lost PF Udonis Haslem to a foot injury.
Kevin Willis, keep your phone on.

The Discovery Channel aired "The Last Day of the Dinosaurs".
It's a documentary about people who refused to vote for Felix Hernandez for the AL Cy Young Award.

The "friendly confines" of Wrigley Field's end zones were found to have walls like the trash compactor scene in Star Wars.

The offenses only worked in one direction in the Northwestern-Illinois Wrigley Field game.
Sort of like in a Carolina Panthers game.

Vuvuzuelas have been banned from the Yale-Harvard game.
Apparently, the schools that have produced the last 4 U.S. presidents don't want any useless hot air-blowing.

The Newton family's attorney said he is "a million percent confident that Cam Newton took no money from no one".
So he took some money from everyone?