VANOC UNVEILS OFFICIAL MASCOTS FOR 2010 GAMES

Vancouver's 2010 Winter Olympic Games mascots were revealed to the public Tuesday. I don't know about you but I wouldn't want these things going anywhere near my kids (if I had any).
Sumi is billed as an "animal guardian spirit" (whatever that is) with a passion for the environment, but is wearing a weird hat that makes it look like he has a third ear growing out of the top of his head.
Quatchi is a sasquatch (that's a bigfoot to you, NBC) who is described as "big, gentle and shy". If he is shy then why the hell was he selected to greet strangers arriving from all over the world? He looks like he fell off a float in the West End's Pride Parade.
Miga is a "sea-bear" who is "small, mischievous and outgoing". Yeah, so's my monthly salary. Miga looks like the unholy love child of Ed Grimley and a Tamagotchi.
There's apparently a fourth creature named Mukmuk who is a "mascot sidekick". Fortunately, Mukmuk seems to have the power of invisibility, as I have been unable to locate his/her/its likeness anywhere.
I never thought it would come to this, but suddenly I am nostalgic for a simpler time when the face of the 2010 Games was a pile of rocks that looked like Stonehenge on acid.