OLYMPIC TORCH RELAY RUNNERS NOT GETTING ANY EXERCISE

San Francisco, CA - Olympic torch relay runners in San Francisco today complained that they are not even breaking a sweat.

Between stopping when blocked by protesters, riding in military ATVs and hanging out in secret security warehouses, many runners said they were unable to get their workout in properly.

"This is so lame," said torch-carrier Anthony Kurpurkis of Berkeley, CA. "Now I'm going to have to go to a spin class after dinner."